"Why don't you want to be a journalist?" he wrote.
It wasn't so much the chiding tone of my tutor's comment on my assignment which bothered me, it was the genuine disappointment and frustration I sensed as he penned the personal note.
Perhaps this is my ego speaking; maybe he says that to all his students who express an interest in jumping to the dark side that is PR. Maybe he just enjoys throwing graduating students a conundrum or two.
Here, have a dilemma.
Given the spirited debate we've been having about jobs and graduation, this comment could not have come at a better time. It's a time where we are forced to defend our stand that we are dreamers; that we are people who are literally living the dream. A time where we decide, then stick with our choices.
Yet why is this bugging me so much? That my choice could be wrong.
Can I trust a boyhood ambition to be a journalist? Have I sold myself short, or was it never really my dream - my real, impassioned dream - to be one in the first place? All of a sudden, I don't know. And if my confidence in my decision wavers so easily, does it suggest that I somehow subconsciously don't believe it to be true?
I guess the only relief is that a decision does not have to be made right now. We shall see.
3 comments:
You don't have to give up your dream, Mr Tan. There is still time and you can also do other things first before becoming a journalist.
haha... aiyah have been giving serious thought to that all-important first job. We shall see... I may indulge my flirtation with journalism next year though, and part-time with a paper while I wait for my results (and grad trip).
Damn cool lah - I think you should give it a go. I am actually considering it too...
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